1. #1
    Unregistered

    Husband forcing me not to join the job

    I am B.tech in ECE . I was recently married and so had to leave my job. But now I want to work again and even have got a good job opportunity to satrt my career once again. I am due to join my new company in 5 days. First my husband was comfortable with it but now suddenly he has changed his mind and is now forcing me not to join my new job. How to deal with this situation?

  2. #2
    srinivasa Array
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    Feb 2013
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    Re: Husband forcing me not to join the job

    hii madam, for a married relation there must be mutual understands between the couple and you two need to understand yourself better than others judge you before.. when your husband was comfortable before and now he is not in favor of you joining the job there must be some reason for your husband in rejecting and forcing you not to join the office.. there are 2 possibility of this behavior show by your husband as because firstly he was comfortable with you..
    1.check whether he is under the influence of others and explain him what is what and need to explain him the fact that they should have understanding and respect each other in better way..
    2.one thing is that you should explain your husband of you working and the importance of having both working would lead to a comfortable life with sufficient money that you get ... all the best

  3. #3
    mainhundon Array
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    Re: Husband forcing me not to join the job

    Hi aspirant

    I think that your husband should not have any problem with you joining your job. If you like to work and not just be a housewife then he should rather support you in this matter than going against you. Wif and husband relationship is based on trust and love and if he loves you he will not do such kind of a thing. Maybe he is under some kind of pressure from his family and so is indulging in such behaviour. You should definitely try to find out the reason for such behaviour of his and thus should persuade him to let you join this job.

    Talk to him when he is in a good mood. Tell him that you have been waiting for a long time to get a good opportunity for starting your career again. Now you have got one and you really wannt to continue working and not just be a housewife. You don't the reason why he is behaving like this but you would like him to suport you in this matter. You both love each other equally and he kis the only one who can understand you in this matter . Thus you hope that he will allow you to joijn this job as you don't want to miss this oportunity.

    I am sure your husband will open up and will tell you the reason for such behaviour and hopefully will reconsider his decision in your favour. Good luck and Thanks

  4. #4
    kshitiswari Array
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    Re: Husband forcing me not to join the job

    Dear,
    First of ask your husband the real matter why he is denying.
    Try to find out the root of the problem by hook or crook.
    I guess there must be a mind wash.
    As because your husband loves you he will definitely be agreed with your proposal of joining the job and you have to also promise not to ignore the family.
    Also take care that your husband must not be influenced by a third person and you family life will be ruined unnecessarily.
    Bye take care.

  5. #5
    yogesh Array
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    Re: Husband forcing me not to join the job

    hello madam I can understand your query as well but finding a solution of this type's question is to tough but not impossible.You should check some internal faults between you and your husband weather there is any mis understandings or not?any work pressure on your hubby?Try to calculate the expense of household and compare it with earnings.If your expense is more then earning needs to do a job.Try to conveying your husband about the joining.May be your husband become agree with you after analyzing the strategy of today life.so be positive with your hubby to call of all quarrel or misunderstood.all the best

  6. #6
    parveengoriya Array
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    Re: Husband forcing me not to join the job

    Good Morninig
    Mam i think you should talk about this with your husband . when his mood is good and also ask for the reason, why he not want you to do a job. your husband will tell you the reason and you have to just clarify them and present, your views that you want to do a job. you also say that you feel alone in home and not able time pass , which make your mood sad. And so, you want to do job to remain busy. if he say , then you should try to convince him with love and affection and ask for a chance.
    he surely give you one chance.
    ALL THE BEST
    HAPPY MARRIAGE LIFE

  7. #7
    Ashok Array
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    Re: Husband forcing me not to join the job

    Quote Originally Posted by Unregistered View Post
    I am B.tech in ECE . I was recently married and so had to leave my job. But now I want to work again and even have got a good job opportunity to satrt my career once again. I am due to join my new company in 5 days. First my husband was comfortable with it but now suddenly he has changed his mind and is now forcing me not to join my new job. How to deal with this situation?
    Hello Aspirant,

    It depends on what your priorities are and if your husband's salary is enough to make up your needs together optimally. If your husband's salary is handsome and if there is no such dire need of extra income in the form of your salary, then according to me, you should spend your time for your husband and family members and if you need to earn to meet your monetary needs then you should join the job.
    It also depends on what your future plans are and what is the timing and nature of your job.Above all,first of all you should convince your husband to agree to join you job,then only you will have good relation with your husband.If you don't have good understanding with your husband,then you will have big mental problem & in that case you may feel no use of doing job & earning money.

    So good relation & understanding is more important than your earning.Think well & proceed further.

    Thanks & good luck.

  8. #8
    Its ams Array
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    Re: Husband forcing me not to join the job

    Hello,

    This is a problem with many married couples. Husbands do not allow their wife to work. They are narrow minded so they find it difficult to let their wife go for job.

    You must talk to your husband about it. Tell him that it is not the matter of money but matter of your interest. You find it difficult to spend your whole day at home doing nothing. Explain him that if you will have job you will feel better and be more happy.

    This is 21st century and the world is has gone far beyond our reach. Anything we do is less and if we do nothing we are no one and will not be counted in this huge population. Every one has the right to do what they like. No one should restrict the other person and take away his happiness.

    You should have told this thing before marriage to your husband. But it is ok for now you must try to convince him politely and say you will do the job only if he permits you happily.

    If he does not agree then do not worry or stress yourself. You have to live with your husband for whole life. Relations are more important than any other thing in this world.

    Hope he permits you to do job.
    All the best

  9. #9
    Ritz Array
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    Re: Husband forcing me not to join the job

    Hi Dear,

    Do not worry as such situations do arise in a woman's life and every woman including you and me has to be prepared to face these situations of our life. All you need to do is have a responsible and an aware conversation with your husband making him feel that you are also a professionally educated individual and if you do not utilise your skills and knowledge, they would be waste and ultimately leave you totally frustrated.

    In fact, I would suggest you not to impose your opinion on your husband, rather discuss in such a way that he would get convinced with your reasons and benefits of a working wife and himself could feel that you would be a support to him and not a liability when you would be working.

    There are a number of benefits of a working partner today. First of all, you are an asset to your family and contribute directly to your family. In addition, you remain happy as you feel that you also have an aim to achieve in life and a happy partner can only keep the family happy. Moreover, the world has become so materialistic and expensive that a single earning member is always burdened with the extra expenses of the family, however, if both the partners are working, luxury is easily available at your doorstep. Most importantly, today every school asks for the profession of both the parents and favours such children whose both the parents are working members.

    So, talk to your husband and convince him in an intelligent manner. I am sure he would agree to your points and show willingness for you to join your new job.

    Thanks.

  10. #10
    RKK Array
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    Re: Husband forcing me not to join the job

    You should talk to your husband when he is free
    Discuss with him all the pros and cons of joining the job
    Also listen to him as to why he wants you not to join the job
    You can also out your views as to why you want to join the job
    Based on the discussions you can come to a conclusion
    You need to be patient and try to explain your husband how you want to make a career for yourself
    I hope he would understand your views

  11. #11
    hggg Array
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    Re: Husband forcing me not to join the job

    madam,
    First of all ask your husband,what is the problem if you join in the job as you have mentioned at the staring he don't have any problem with your job.But now he is not accepting you to do the job.He is influenced by some one or he is afraid of the present situation in our country.
    If you feel that the job is very essential for you then tell the importance of your job to your husband and try to convince him.Tell him that you can lead a happy and comfortable life.
    all the best
    thank you

  12. #12
    amit gupta007 Array
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    Re: Husband forcing me not to join the job

    Hello friend

    Mam it is nice to hear that you are interested in doing the job and it is in fact good decision.if we have the quality then we should use it in productive manner when we get the opportunities,also you have the work experience which will help you a lot.

    But the problem is that your husband isn't agree for the same.you should talk to your husband and try to convince him for this.

    You should ask him the reasons why he isn't agree for this then convince him by giving appropriate answers.

    You can tell him that you feel bore in the house and you something for your time pass as you are eligible for the job and also experienced so you want to go for it.
    also due to this income of the family will also increase by which they can enhance their living standard and fulfill their needs.
    Try to convince him politely when is mood is nice, i am sure he will understand you and allow you to do the job.

    All the best
    Thank you.

  13. #13
    hardick Array
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    Re: Husband forcing me not to join the job

    If your husband dont want you to work then you should listen to him at once that why he is thinking like that if you find the thing by which he is insisting you to work then it will be easier for you to make him agree to allow to work.
    Because sometimes due to some misunderstanding husband does not want you to work outside so you need to clear all the misunderstandings first because without any fault if you stop working then all the responsibility will come on your husbands shoulder and after that he will feel overburdened and finally he will be frustrated by the same and then he will remove the frustration on you after that your relation with your husband will become worth less and then it will be the worst situation.
    So it will be better for you to talk with the husband to solve the issue because nowadays jobs are not to be gained easily.

  14. #14
    Boss Array
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    Re: Husband forcing me not to join the job

    I do think that a spouse probably should not possess any issue on hand getting started with your own job. If you love to be effective rather than just be a housewife he then should fairly you during this issue compared to going towards you. Wif in addition to spouse partnership is dependent on confidence in addition to love in case they really loves an individual he may definitely not accomplish this sort of a thing. Probably they're below some kind of stress coming from his / her loved ones and so is actually experiencing this sort of behaviour. If not try to find out the real reason for this sort of conduct of his / her and therefore should encourage him to lead you to sign up for this kind of job.

    Consult him when he is actually in a very very good mood. Tell him this you're holding out for a long period to get a better chance of beginning your employment again. Currently you need 1 and you seriously want to remain operating rather than just be a housewife. That you do not the reason they're performing like this yet you would like him to sport an individual during this matter. You both love the other person both equally and man or woman who will recognize an individual during this issue.As a result an individual expect that she will let you join this task as you don't want to skip this kind of opportunity.
    I'll recognize your own concern also yet looking for a resolution on this type's real question is to tough but is not impossible.You should check a number of interior defects involving you and the spouse climate there's almost any mis understanding this is?almost any work stress on you.Try to evaluate the expense of house in addition to review the item using earnings.If your own expenditure is more and then making desires to complete any job.Try to transferring your own spouse about the joining.May be your spouse grow to be concur with an individual following considering the particular means of now life.so be absolutely sure together with your hubby to get in touch with off fight or perhaps misunderstood.

  15. #15
    priya378 Array
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    Re: Husband forcing me not to join the job

    Hello..,

    It is very important that there exist a mutual understanding among the couples after the marriage. This is very important for a healthy family. Your parents had spent a lot on your education so that one day you stand on your own feet. Its not a matter of financial assistance that you are required to get a job. This should be for your own satisfaction and a stand in the society. And i think that in no case any body should suggest you not to join the job. If you feel you can manage your household as well as your office work nicely , then you should go for it.
    Your husband had no problem initially but now he shows some. I think there is some queries in his mind. Have a discussion over the topic and try to find what exactly the problem is. He might have been influenced by some others. You tell the positive aspects like income increase for the family. You also tell him that if you work outside you will feel good and enjoy the day.
    It is very important to become self -dependent for every one in this present generation not just for income because that is undoubtedly provided to you by your family,but for ones own recognition.Hope you get your problems solved.

    Thank You.

  16. #16
    G.one Array
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    Re: Husband forcing me not to join the job


    • Mutual understanding between husband and wife is very much necessary in order to execute any work.
    • You must have to know the reason due to which he is not allowing you to do job.
    • Earlier he was ready but now he is not, it's shows that something has gone wrong in just few days.
    • These days thinking is changing among people regarding women's freedom to job but still there may be some who has influenced your husband decision.
    • Talk with your husband frankly and also assure him if he is having any fear in respect to your job.

  17. #17
    aashisranjan784 Array
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    Re: Husband forcing me not to join the job

    Dear Friend

    This is a general problem with Indian woman that their husband do not allow them to do job .There are several reasons for this some thing that it is against their family status that women go outside to do work .

    In order to overcome this problem ,you need to discuss this matter in a better way rather having argument on this matter .If you will try to have argument it may spoil your married life.Convince your husband about the benefits that will be underway if you do job .Tell him that you need to utilize your skills for which your laboured hard in early career.

    But let me tell you that you must not forget the basic responsibility of being a wife or daughter in law because when women start to work and earn money they think that they are indepedent and start ignoring the other works of home.

    So try to cope up with both.


    Hope the information helps you as much as you expect .For any other assistance please do not forget to leave a message here .We will get back to you as soon as possible.


    Enjoy your life and all the best for your career.


    aashisranjan784

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